How to Deal with Disappointment Part II: 5 Practical Tips
In part I of How to Deal with Disappointment, I opened up about my bitter experiences and highlighted that social media can distort our sense of reality.
In this part II, I will share 5 practical tips for you to navigate through life after disappointments.
Creative life is a series of disappointments until you succeed. Here are some tips to overcome the hurt feeling.
Tip 01: Honour Your Bravery
If you don’t try, you won’t even get to be disappointed.
Disappointment is a badge of honour because if you don’t try, you won’t even have the chance to experience disappointment. Celebrate the fact that you stepped out of your comfort zone, providing an opportunity for growth and renewed determination.
Tip 02: Validate Yourself
Did you know George Michael’s hit “Careless Whisper” took two demos, two recordings, and three years before its release?
“Careless Whisper” took three years to be released.
George Michael and Andrew Ridgeley wrote the song in 1981. Driven by belief in their creation, George Michael flew to Alabama in 1983 to record with legendary music producer Jerry Wexler. But the outcome was somewhat disappointing.
“Careless Whisper” stands as a testament to the power of self-validation.
The singer decided to re-record and produce the song himself, finally released in 1984 as his first solo single. “Careless Whisper” stands as a testament to the power of self-validation.
Remember this: Your conviction in your work needs no validation from others.
Tip 03: Pause — Recognise The Role Of Negative Emotions
One of my goals in 2024 was to submit my artwork for the RA Summer Show open call but in the end, I decided against it. I just could not face another disappointment at that time. I recognised that the hurt feeling was there to protect me against further damage.
Pause is not giving up.
It’s not wise to keep trying while still hurting. It’s like adding salt to a raw open injury. You need to let it heal first. Pause is not giving up. There is always the next time.
If you want to learn more about the benefits of good stress, I recommend this podcast: Embracing Good Stress: A Journey to Mindful Resilience.
Don’t add salt to a raw open injury
On a side note, I also decided not to submit my work for Fedrigoni’s open call for a completely different reason. I got in twice in the past, so I wanted to make space for others (Here is my Linkedin post). And I know at least a few people applied after seeing this. This made me very happy.
Tip 04: Talk to Real People
As mentioned in part I, social media distorts our perception of reality. Given the fact 82% of people are rejected by Arts Council DYCP grants, you are likely to meet more people who were unsuccessful than successful.
Social media distorts our perception of reality
Also for the open call I didn’t get in (but shortlisted), I asked for feedback from the organiser and they kindly replied.
They said my application was strong but could not match with a scientist. So it was not about the quality of work but there was no appropriate match this time.
I was encouraged to try next year again and feel much better that a) I tried and b) I got positive feedback.
Tip 05: Initiate Closure
Take back control by initiating closure yourself. After the second unsuccessful application for the grant, I decided that Arts Council was not the right organisation to fund my project. The project aims to change the visual language of psychedelics, especially for clinical use, to destigmatise public perception.
I concluded that the project was too progressive for a government-funded body .
Just like George Micheal, I still believe in this project but I concluded that for a government-funded body, it’s probably too progressive. I’d best be seeking funds and collaborators elsewhere. Goodbye Arts Council, no hard feelings.
Gif source: giphyIn part III, I’ll share the stories of resilience from renowned figures to empower you. If you’re keen to learn more and stay optimistic, sign up for my newsletter.
I’m currently working on a series of paintings inspired by my challenging experiences. You can also follow my journey in real-time on:
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I’m June aka MAMIMU, an artist / lecturer on a mission to spread optimism. If you share the same vision and want to make the world a better place through public art, product collaboration, workshops, or anything else, let's talk.
Together, we can amplify our impact and create a brighter future for all.